A Walk on the Other Side of the Webcam

Steve · Joined: 08 Jan 2003

A Walk on the Other Side of the Webcam

Guys of all shapes, sizes, and marital statuses surf the web on a daily basis for adult webcam sites. These sites put them in contact with a variety of women who will do a variety of things in front of their webcam (for a price, of course). In fact, webcams have become something of the virtual whorehouse, a place to get away from the nagging of the wife or girlfriend and just enjoy a nice, anonymous e-fuck. No, it's not quite the same as having sex, but on some sites, it comes pretty damn close, and you can enjoy it all from the privacy of your own home.

While it’s pretty obvious why most guys visit adult webcam chats, I always wonder why the girls are there. The money, obviously, is a draw, but if that’s what they wanted, why not find a job at a local strip club or pose nude instead of getting online for long periods of time? In fact, there’s always the chance that a girl isn’t going to get a single paid private chat during her “shift,” so the job isn’t even financially secure! To discover the answers to these questions and more, I set out to chat with some real live webcam girls and get their thoughts on the industry.

Finding My Cam Connection

But where to find these webcam girls? During free chat, they were much more interested in flirting with guys in hopes of getting a private chat than in answering my questions, which is completely understandable. In fact, I felt bad even trying that angle. Then came my break: while having lunch with Wil, a friend and fellow writer, we discussed our current projects. When I mentioned I was going to interview webcam girls, he nearly choked on his Pepsi. Turns out, his ex used to perform!

The two are still good friends, and he immediately called her up and told her what I needed. She agreed to answer some questions and to talk to some of her friends still in the business to see if they would help me out. None of the three girls had any objection being interviewed, although they did ask that I change their names. I also talked to Wil and the husband of another of the girls to get their perspectives.

She Works Hard For The Money

First of all, I should say that these webcam girls are exceedingly nice. None of them had any hard feelings about their job. In fact, that's how the approached it—it's a job. “It was very non-personal for me,” said Jenny, Wil's ex. “To me, it was no different from my job as a waitress. The guys ordered what they wanted and I delivered. There were no feelings involved.”

Marti, a Secretfriends girl from California, agreed. “Sure, I got to know my repeat customers a little better, but I never let myself form any kind of connection. No offense, but guys on that site weren't really the type of guy I'd want to date.” When asked if they would meet any of their online customers for coffee, none of the girls—Jenny, Marti, or Kelly—said they would. “They just want to get off,” Kelly said. “No one is on a webcam site to make friends or find the love of their life, don’t fool yourself.”

This led me to ask the girls why they were on the site. While the girls had various other reasons, the money was the major factor. Wil was greatly impressed with Jenny's income. “We were living in New York at the time, and I was working as an editor for a publishing house. I was pulling a pretty nice paycheck, but we could have paid the rent on our two-bedroom apartment on her income alone, and in New York, that's saying something.”

“I bought my 2007 Solara from my private chats,” Kelly said. “It's the easiest money I've ever made. I get off, they get off, we're all happy, and I get paid. Who could ask for a better job?”

The Couple That Cams Together…?

But the girls also had other reasons for working in the webcam world other than the money. For Jenny and Wil, it became a part of their relationship. “She was usually online for around eight hours a day during the evening and night,” Wil said, “so if I wanted to spend time with her, I almost always had to do it while she was working.”

He continued by saying that he usually watched her perform for a few hours a night, maybe more depending on what he was doing. “It was totally a turn on for me,” Jenny said. “In fact, some nights seeing him react to what I was doing was the only way for me to really get into it. I hate to say that, but there were some nights when I really wasn't aroused or interested in doing anything.”

“It was a new and different sexual experience for me,” Wil added. “The first time, I felt kind of awkward. Here she was, talking to some other guy while I was masturbating behind the camera. But I also found the idea of someone getting off to her while she was getting off to me really hot. I don't know why, maybe I like people watching. Anyway, it just kind of became our usual thing...I think we probably masturbated together while she was working more than we actually had sex.”

Jenny agreed. “It made me more comfortable having him there. It was nice not hiding it or feeling like I was going behind his back. I probably wouldn’t have stuck with it for so long if he hadn’t been OK with it.”

Both were very clear in stating that Jenny's webcam work had nothing to do with their breakup. “In fact,” Wil remarked, “I kind of miss it. It was a very different experience that I doubt I’ll ever have again.”

Webcam Acting 101

For Marti, the webcam experience was also practice for her day job. As an actress, she said she’s always looking for a character to play, and working as a SecretFriend gives her just that opportunity. “Who I am when I’m online is a completely different person than who I am in real life,” she said. “In that way, it’s kind of fun.”

Marti went on to add that she feels more comfortable in front of the camera if she’s in character. “It’s not Marti showing her tits to guys all over the world,” she explained. “For me, that makes a huge difference. I’m not the kind of girl who would do that, but my online persona is. I even buy clothes and underwear that I only wear for webcam work. Whenever I put those clothes on, I become someone else, someone who enjoys being a little slutty and helping guys get off.”

Feeling That Sexy Feeling

For Kelly, webcam work not only pays the bills, it also makes her feel good about herself. “I feel sexy,” she said. “I do it because it makes me feel really good about myself. I mean, sure, my husband, Derek, makes me feel attractive, but it’s not the same. There’s nothing that makes me feel sexy like a group of guys watching me online and jacking off because of what I’m doing. It’s addictive.”

When I asked her what her husband’s opinion was, she forwarded my email on to him and let him answer for himself. “I wasn’t very happy with her doing it at first, even though the money was nice,” Derek said. “But it really does make her feel better about herself. She stopped saying she was fat and started wearing sexy clothes.”

“I bought some clothes just to wear for my webcam shows,” Kelly said. “After performing, I sometimes do a show for Derek. It feels good to be wanted by guys, and it makes me feel so much more sexual. Our sex life is much better!”

Chatting It Up

The girls all had differing opinions on the guys who bought private time with them. Kelly approached chats in a business-like manner, more so than Jenny or Marti. “Yes, it makes me feel good about myself,” she answered, “but I also know that the guys there have one goal in mind. I’m more or less an object to them, but I’m OK with that. I’m willing to talk with them but only to the point that they want. No one is there to make friends.”

Marti, however, disagreed to an extent. “I liked talking to some of the guys online. Yes, they want to see me naked, but some of them also actually want to get to know me or know how my day has gone. I enjoy that, but at the same time, I don’t want to really get to know them. I feel bad admitting this now, but I rarely answer them truthfully. Like I said, online I’m not Marti, I’m someone else, and I have invented this entire character to play. I’m not an actress online. I tell guys I work in sales at Macy’s and live in New York. Sometimes I even make up stories about horrible customers or whatever as part of my character.”

“I actually have kept in touch with a couple of guys I got to know really well,” Jenny said. “We’ve never actually met, and I don’t know that I’d ever want to meet them, but they’re nice guys. We just email and all now that I’m not doing shows, and I like talking to them. But at the same time, meeting someone who has seen me naked and knows what I like to do…that’s a little odd.”

All three women have also had experiences with the other type of guys. “I get rude guys all the time,” Kelly said. “I usually do my best to ignore them, and they eventually get tired and go away.”

“Yes, there are some guys who get a little disrespectful,” Marti agreed, “but for me, the other guys in the room usually call them on it and take up for me. I don’t mind telling a guy off if he’s getting way out of line, either. Sure, it means I lose a customer, but it usually gains me points with the other guys.”

After A Long Day’s Work….

At the end of the day, Jenny, Marti, and Kelly all agreed that performing online was fun, and Jenny said she’d do it again if she needed the money. Marti and Kelly both have no plans of turning off their cams anytime soon. “I’ll keep doing it until I get a role or a job that pays better or requires more time,” Marti said. “It’s not like I have to work a 40 hour work-week on my cam. I can pick up as much as I want, which is really nice.”

“I will eventually give it up,” Kelly said. “I want to have a family and, at some point, a more normal career. I can’t exactly talk about my job at family holidays, and even though some guys do like watching pregnant women, I don’t think that’s something I’ll want to do.”

Money, fun, role-playing…all of these reasons make webcam work fun for the three women I interviewed. For them, running a webcam is like any other job, only with different hours and a more provocative wardrobe. It has even been possible for them to work their relationships into their job, something that I was very curious to learn about.

Next time you visit a webcam girl, don’t think she’s just a sex-starved bimbo there to make some cash. She might be practicing a role, wanting to feel sexy, or getting off for her boyfriend. Just like she has no idea what’s going on in our bedrooms, we have no clue what she’s got going on beyond the view of her camera.

stooly · Joined: 02 Nov 2007

Very nice read, thanks Steve! I have befriended a few girls who do this for a living, some full time, some part time. They all have different reasons. Usually though, it's just because it's easy & fast money. One girl in particular, she was a real sweetheart, was studying to be a nurse or something & would fire up her cam for the tuition.

I myself have always been tempted to do it, just because. I mean, getting paid to be kinky over a webcam, definitely my kind of job, I think I would thoroughly enjoy it! But my wonderful young wife would be terribly unhappy at a bunch of strange men gawking at me & even though she'd never outright tell me no, I could never hurt her like that. hehe Maybe in another life :)